satire

ICC ODI World Cup 2011: Ode To Kenya, Just a summer of 69?

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(Sung by Steve Tikolo and his band of miserly men to the tune of Bryan Adams’ Summer of 69)

We got no real sixes
Bought it against a Kiwi side

Tried to bat but we just bled

Was the summer of 69
Me and the guys from Kenya
Obanda six and Tikolo a brace

Shoulda known we’d never get far

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The ATP Tour: Two And A Half Men?

Dhoni and Sreesanth understand each other

Sourav Ganguly has not retired yet (Satire)

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Sourav Ganguly has retired from international cricket.

Sourav Ganguly has not retired from international cricket.

Sourav Ganguly wishes to play in the IPL.

Sourav Ganguly cannot play in the IPL.

Sourav Ganguly will play in the Ranji trophy.

Sourav Ganguly will play for Bengal only if he can play in the IPL.

Sourav Ganguly will play domestic cricket to stay fit for the IPL.

Sourav Ganguly is not confused.

I am.

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Quote/Misquote: Stanislas Wawrinka,Roger Federer,Novak Djokovic,Rafael Nadal,Venus Williams, Caroline Wozniacki and Na Li (Satire)

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STANISLAS WAWRINKA

"I have no idea. Sorry. I have no idea why."

What he really meant:

I don’t know why Europeans dominate tennis right now. I just play, man, don’t bother me.

What he definitely didn’t:

The Europeans have stolen the Americans’ and Australians’ spinach and will keep popping them in the eye.

(Popeye refrain "I’s bin hornswoggled!” in background.)

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Quote Misquote: Roger Federer,Novak Djokovic, Li Na and Maria Sharapova

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ROGER FEDERER

“Yeah, I mean, they say that very quickly, so…

Let’s talk in six months again.”

What he really meant:

Don’t write off Rafa or me as yet.

What he definitely didn’t:

Yeah, Rafa and I are going to quit the sport in six months.

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Caroline Wozniacki’s kangaroo and Mahesh Bhupathi and Leander Paes Vamos their opponents (Satire)

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Post-match press conferences are boring.

I mean, come on, who wants to talk about the match? It’s just another day at the office. Get wise, guys, we’re pros. It’s our job.

You don’t believe me? Ask Caroline Wozniacki.

The Great Dane felt that the best way to entertain her fans and journalists was to tell a little fib about wrestling a kangaroo.

The kangaroo gave the pretty No. 1 a small cut. Or that’s how the story went.

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IPL: Lalit Modi, the know-it all, really knows it all (Satire)

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Wikileaks—the pro-transparency website— has released transcripts of the Parliamentary Standing Committee hearing into the finances of the IPL.

The BCCI officials summoned include president Shashank Manohar, secretary N Srinivasan and IPL commissioner Chirayu Amin. The panel is headed by BJP MP  Yashwant Sinha, the former finance minister.

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League of Champions: Out of the Indian Premier League (Satire)

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The dust has settled on the IPL auctions.The players have been bought (or not).The teams have been formed (or not). The franchises are happy (or not).

The rumour mills ,however, have been overactive.

Among the numerous reports floating around, these are the more salient ones:

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Bolshoi The Boxer forms the Indian Doggy League (IDL) (Satire)

My dog, Bolshoi The Boxer, said to me this morning: “Botox and I are going to form our own super sports league.”

“Hmm…. That’s interesting.” I reply, sipping my ante meridiem cuppa tea.

“If the Indian cricketers can have the ICL and IPL, the hockey players, the IHL and the tennis players, the ITL, then us canines should have a league of our own.”