India

Kapil Dev: What he said, really meant and definitely did not

What he said:

"Dhoni has made mockery of Test cricket by bowling (himself).”

Kapil Dev is less-than-enthused over Mahendra Singh Dhoni’s decision to be the spare bowler in Zaheer Khan’s absence due to a hamstring injury in the first Test at Lords.

What he really meant:

“First he took away my glory at being India’s only World Cup winning captain, now he wants to bowl medium-pace as well. Where will he stop?”

What he definitely didn’t:

“Dhoni da jawab nahin.”

England Lord it over Team India in first Test

Mahendra Singh Dhoni had this to say about the first Test loss at Lords: “What could go wrong, went wrong.”

The Indian skipper attributed the defeat to three factors: Zaheer Khan’s injury, the lack (consequently) of a third seamer (the Jharkhand native rolled his arm over) and misfortunes (Gautam Gambhir’s elbow blow and Sachin Tendulkar’s viral flu) that forced the reshuffling of the batting order in the final innings.

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Vijay Mallya withdraws United Breweries ad “in the spirit of cricket”

Saurav Ganguly: What he said, really meant and definitely did not

What he said:

“You’ll not get another Sachin Tendulkar in a short time, or it could be you never get a Sachin Tendulkar.”

Saurav Ganguly is an unabashed Sachin Tendulkar fan.

What he really meant:

“A genius like Tendulkar comes along once in a generation or two.”

What he definitely didn’t:

“We’re cloning Tendulkars at Eden Gardens and Wankhede.”

Elizabeth Hurley: What she said, really meant and definitely did not

What she said:

"SW does not wear eye makeup or have an ‘eye liner tattoo’ – his eyes were born that way!"

Elizabeth Hurley rushes to the defence of  her boyfriend, Shane Warne, categorically denying that the blonde leg-spinner has been using her make-up to appear attractive.

What she really meant:

“Beauty is in the eye of the beholder and not in eyeliners!”

What she definitely didn’t:

“Beauty is skin-deep.Hence, I’m returning my Estee Lauder products.”

Saurav Ganguly: What he said, really meant and definitely did not

What he said:

“They are offering me honorary membership, and rightly so.”

Saurav Ganguly is insouciant about being offered honorary membership by the Marleybone Cricket Club (MCC) despite the disapproving eyebrows raised by his fellow commentator Nasser Hussain and traditionalists for his shirt-ripping stunt a few years ago at Lords.

What he really meant:

“It’s not the old stuffy Lords anymore. These guys recognise South Asian cricketers nowadays. Ask Sunny Gavaskar, ask Kumara Sangakkara.”

What he definitely didn’t:

“I’ll accept the honour bare-chested.”

Kevin Pietersen: What he said, really meant and definitely did not

What he said:

“But we don’t hate the Indians, we are friends with them.”

Kevin Pietersen—in his column—emphasises that his team enjoys a friendly rivalry with the Indian cricket team.

What he really meant:

“Of course, we’re pals. RCB, IPL, Vijay Mallya, cheerleaders—our common interests.And cricket, of course.”

 

What he definitely didn’t:

“Bamboozle me, Yuvi.”

Shane Warne: What he said, really meant and definitely did not

What he said:

“It will be a shoot-out between both bowling attacks."

Shane Warne believes that the better bowling side will take the honours in the India versus England Test series, beginning on the 21st of July, 2011.

What he really meant:

“The faster and the more furious, the better.”

What he definitely didn’t:

“It’s the Wild West all over again. Hey, wait a second, was cricket played out there—then?”

Andrew Strauss: What he said, what he really meant and definitely did not

What he said:

"We don’t want that fairytale to come true though."

Andrew Strauss is certain that his team has no intention of gifting Indian maestro, Sachin Tendulkar, his 100th century on the occasion of the 2000th Test —also the 100th five-day match between the two sides.

What he really meant:

“Fairy tales are bedtime reading. Tons are hard won. The only magic is hard work and grit.”

What he definitely didn’t:

“We’ll have Kevin Pietersen, our Prince Charming, bowl to Sachin.”

Rahul Dravid: What he said, really meant and definitely did not

What he said:

“We are still getting used to his sense of humour. But he has got one — a very good one when you get to know him.”

Rahul Dravid and the rest of his buddies in the Indian squad are getting to know the Indian coach, Duncan Fletcher, better, beginning with his sense of humour.

What he really meant:

“Fletcher’s sense of humour is growing on us. It’s like sushi—an acquired taste.”

What he definitely didn’t:

“Fletcher’s a stand-up comedian.”