ICC

Graeme Swann: What he said, really meant and definitely did not

What he said:

“I don’t think I could still be the light-hearted, piss-taking guy if I was in a position of authority.”

Graeme Swann prefers not being in a position of responsibility. He did not apply for the job of England skipper because he’d rather have fun on and off the field.

What he really meant:

“You know when you’re skipper you have to be this diplomatic guy careful not to hurt anyone’s feelings.Well, that’s not me.”

What he definitely didn’t:

“Being skipper is a bed of roses. You don’t have to take piss.”

Santosh Desai: What he said, really meant and definitely did not

What he said:

“The BCCI is a banana republic, it answers to no regulatory body.”

Santosh Desai, a social commentator, is under no illusions about how the BCCI conducts business. He was commenting on the conflict of interest inherent in Sunil Gavaskar and Ravi Shastri contracted to the  BCCI while offering their opinions for Sky Television.

What he really meant:

“The BCCI is a banana republic; working with it is akin to trying to retain one’s balance while treading a banana skin.”

What he definitely didn’t:

“Sunil Gavaskar and Ravi Shastri endorse plantains for the BCCI.”

Poonam Pandey: What she said, really meant and definitely did not

What she said:

“God gave women legs, so we show them off.”

Poonam Pandey, who made the headlines promising to strip if Team Indian won the ICC ODI World Cup, is not shy of making further provocative comments. She is to be one of the stars leading a Slutwalk in Mumbai—come September.

What she really meant:

“Legs are not just meant for walking, you know.”

What she definitely didn’t:

“How would you  like them, waxed or in all their hairy splendour?”

Ravi Bopara: What he said, really meant and definitely did not

What he said:

“Yeah, it’s dead right now in my car.”

Ravi Bopara has his life organized with an IPad—only it’s not charged. Bopara takes Jonathan Trott’s place in the third nPower Test at Edgbaston, Birmingham.

What he really meant:

“That I’m a mere cricketer does not mean I’m not tech savvy. Sure, it’s charged.”

What he definitely didn’t:

“My car batteries are dead too.”

Mahendra Singh Dhoni: What he said, really meant and definitely did not

What he said:

"Look at them, some day one of them will just collapse."

Mahendra Singh Dhoni is not enamoured about the amount of cricket his team has played in recent times.

What he really meant:

“My players are tired and jaded. Isn’t that evident?”

What he definitely didn’t:

“Team India are pushovers—literally.”

Alan Butcher: What he said, really meant and definitely did not

“Zimbabweans pride themselves on being hospitable. So even in this match, we keep throwing them a lifeline.”

Zimbabwean coach, Alan Butcher, throws up an innovative excuse for letting their opponents, Bangladesh, off the hook in the Test at Harare.

What he really meant:

“We do want the Bangladeshis returning for more. They’re  the only team we can beat regularly.”

What he definitely didn’t:

“We take pride in losing matches at home.”

Parthiv Patel: What he said, really meant and definitely did not

What he said:

“Whenever I close my eyes and seek inspiration during trying times, I see only Tendulkar!"

Parthiv Patel, who made his Test debut at 17, has just one idol—Indian icon, Sachin Tendulkar.

What he really meant:

“Inspiration—thy name is Sachin Tendulkar.”

What he definitely didn’t:

“Eyes wide shut, I have T20 vision—visions of Tendulkar.”

Sunil Gavaskar: What he said, really meant and definitely did not

What he said:

“It looked like a contest between a professional team and a schoolboys team.”

Sunil Gavaskar is scathing in his criticism of the Indian team’s performance against a superior English side.

What he really meant:

“It’s no wonder warm-up games feature second string players (Northamptonshire).”

What he definitely didn’t:

“Isn’t this remark pithier than Boycott’s ‘India played like Bangladesh’?”

Kapil Dev: What he said, really meant and definitely did not

What he said:

“Why should they speak out against the board? Will a Congress leader speak against his party in Parliament?”

Kapil Dev makes his opinion known as to whether Sunil Gavaskar and Ravi Shastri can be unbiased with their statements in the press box while being simultaneously indentured to the BCCI and providing expert views for Sky Sports.

What he really meant:

“The BCCI functions like a (Indian) political party. Either you toe the party line or you’re out.”

What he definitely didn’t:

“Are there any vacant slots for me, in that box?”

Sunil Gavaskar: What he said, really meant and definitely did not

What he said:

“But they have got to remember that achievers, like them, also have two eyes, two hands—and a stomach (to feed)!”

Sunil Gavaskar is unconvinced that his contract with the BCCI as a paid commentator conflicts with his role as an expert for Sky Sports. Ravi Shastri is the other ex-cricketer hired by the Indian administrative body, each paid Rs. 3.6 crores annually. The master opener defends his position saying that there are conflicts in every sphere of life.

What he really meant:

“Hey, if the BCCI and Sky Sports don’t care, why should you? Lump it or leave it.”

What he definitely didn’t:

“I’m not paid by either party.”