bresnan

Indian cricket: Thirteen Englishmen is all it took

A tale of 13 Englishmen and how they upended the No.1 Test team in the world:

Strauss promised he’d make them Rew,

their ill-preparedness and  inability to decipher swing.

Alistair Cooked their goose with a 294,

Edgbaston was his Baston.

Trott lumbered out muttering,

“My name’s Jon-A-Ton”.

Ian rang the Bell,

the chimes of dethronement.

Kevin hit his stride and

the Indians’ fight Pietered out.

Eoin has not quite had them under the gun,

yet his pellets had bite too.

Ravi has yet to hop and Bop,

but he’ll have his chances.

Matt’s no doormat,

Someone should have warned the men in blue—Prior.

Chris had them Tremling in the first,

Bresnan had them cowering later

with Timidity.

Stuart saunters in whistling,

“The English bats are Broad,

right to No. 10”.

The English duckling is now a Swann.

And with Anderson sounding the bowling clarion call,

It’s simply “EndJames” for Dhoni.

Lottery: A tax on people who are bad at math. Ambrose Bierce

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Tim Bresnan: What he said, really meant and definitely did not

What he said:

"It’d help if the India fielders didn’t have their hands in their pockets. It’s not that cold. They need to look interested [in play] and show some desire. If you don’t want to be here, go home."

Tim Bresnan is not amused with the attitude of the Indian cricket team on the field in the third Test at Edgbaston, Birmingham. The Indians folded for 224 in their outing, the fifth consecutive innings where they have been bowled out for less than 300 runs.

What he really meant:

“We like winning but against competitive sides—not deadbeats.It devalues our efforts.”

What he definitely didn’t:

“If the Indians need extra sweaters, they can pick up some from our dressing room.”

MS Dhoni wins hearts: Team India fail second Test

Of the two sides fighting for the No.1 Test spot, only one stepped up to the plate; that side was not India.

Mahendra Singh Dhoni won hearts with his sporting act on the third day of the second nPower Test series.

His team’s performance, however, raised a lot more questions.