retirement

Q & A with Roger Federer

Not so good, actually, but, of course, I’m not going to say that despite my having my worst year (in terms of majors) since 2002.

2) How’s it going at Montreal?

Not good at all. I thought that Tsonga would take the hint and realize it’s Rogers’ Cup but no. Now they all enjoy taking the mickey out of me. And Nadal (chuckling).

3) Will this affect your US Open preparation?

No, not at all. You saw how I played prior to the French Open and yet I made the finals at Roland Garros.

4) Is retirement on the cards?

I’m still young, I float like a butterfly and sting like a bee (occasionally). Don’t count me out till I’m 35 and then I’ll join Pete (Sampras) on the Champions’ tour.

5) How does Mirka feel about you continuing your touring ways?

As long as I babysit the kids, she has no complaints. (Luckily, the diapers changing phase is past).

Do say: You’re still No.3.

Don’t say: 16—no more.

Disclaimer: The character(s) are real but the interview is fictional.

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I don’t make jokes. I just watch the government and report the facts. Will Rogers

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Brett Geeves: What he said, really meant and definitely did not

Australian fast bowler,Brett Geeves,announces his retirement from first-class cricket. He joins the growing legion of pacers who feel that their bodies cannot cope with the non-stop nature of the game. The toil and rigours defy the laws of bio-mechanics.

What he really meant:

“My back’s had it, mate. As for the Egyptians, they’re all crying: “Mummy!”

What he definitely didn’t:

“I’m off to play cricket in Cairo.”

Shahid Afridi: What he said, really meant and definitely did not

"There is nothing bigger than a man’s respect, and the way the board has treated me, there is a limit to everything."

Shahid Afridi announces his conditional retirement from international cricket.

What he really meant:

“Power and respect comes from the barrel of a gun and my retirement’s the smoking gun. At least, I hope.”