BCCI

Diego Maradona: What he said, really meant and definitely did not

What he said:

"This is not a family if no one plays soccer. No one is asking what can be done to improve soccer. There are motorcyclists, swimmers, race car drivers, but there is not one soccer player that can give advice."

Diego Maradona refuses to be part of the FIFA family.

What he really meant:

"At least, I played the game. These guys treat players like we do footballs."

What he definitely didn’t:

"FIFA, live and learn from the BCCI."

(Assuming, of course,that Maradona follows cricket—Indian cricket.)

Players whine about BCCI power (Humour)

Who’s afraid of  Barrack Obama?

Certainly not international cricketers.

Why should they care about the most powerful man in the world, when they have to deal with the BCCI? Proximity bites.

The Indian cricket board is not popular with current players cutting across national borders.

You would think otherwise. Without the IPL, foreign players are at the mercy of their respective cricketing boards.

The lousy ingrates.

Cricketers believe that the BCCI has an undue influence on the ICC’s decision-making.

Grow up, chaps. Money makes the world go round—clockwise and counter-clockwise.

They whinge yet 32% promise to retire prematurely from national commitments  to take part in the IPL and sundry T20 tournaments.

Aren’t you chewing off the hand that feeds?

Red wine for the whiners, please!

Note: You didn’t get this from the grapevine.

Quote of the day:
You can’t build a reputation on what you are going to do. – Henry Ford

Bishan Singh Bedi: What he said, really meant and definitely did not

What he said:

“When the players have been bought like slaves at an auction, they just can’t have rights.”

Bishan Singh Bedi minces no words in taking the BCCI to task for its hypocritical stance on the ‘club versus country’ debate.

What he really meant:

“The IPL is no EPL.”

What he definitely didn’t:

“The BCCI functions democratically and IPL franchisees are democracies.”

Chirayu Amin looks to China for IPL cheerleaders (Satire)

MUMBAI—

IPL Commissioner, Chirayu Amin, spoke to MakeTimeForSports on the fall-out of the Gabriella Pasqualotto affair and steps taken to remedy the situation.

MTFS: What are you doing to ensure against the recurrence of a Gabriella Pasqualotto?

CA: We are extremely perturbed by the South African cheerleader’s antics and have taken steps to prevent such an event recurring. We are currently talking to the franchisees about rethinking their attitude towards Western cheerleaders and look farther east, specifically China, for pom-pom girls next year.

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Rahul Gandhi and the SMS Pitch (Satire)

JAIPUR—

Sources within the Congress(I) and the BCCI have—in confidence—revealed that the real reason Rahul Gandhi is in police custody is because the Rajasthan Cricket Association (RCA) is miffed with the Congress’ General Secretary and are considering charging him with damaging the Sawai Mansingh cricket pitch.

It is understood that Rahul Gandhi wished to get a feel for farming before he launched his campaign supporting UP farmers. He believed that doing some ‘fielding’ on his own would lend authenticity to the Congress’ support.

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Recap and implications of ICC’s Cricket Committee recommendations

Cricket Ireland will welcome the recommendations made by the ICC’s cricket committee on Wednesday, the 11th of May, 2011.

Associate teams will be allowed to participate in the 2015 World Cup through a qualifying process. The next World Cup will not default to Test-playing nations. Teams will have to earn the right to be in the elite group of participating nations.

Cricket fans will start to believe again that “yes, the administrators are playing cricket.”

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Gabriella Pasqualotta bares all (Satire)

Gabriella Pasqualotta—the South African cheerleader ejected for telling tales on IPL cricketers—revealed all in an exclusive interview to MakeTimeForSports.

The long-legged blonde said: “I have been victimised not for blogging about cricketers and their boorish behaviour but simply because I chose to disclose all in the English language. Had I written my blog in Afrikaans or Swahili, I could have got away scot-free.”

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Weekend Cricket Diary: Chanderpaul,Pataudi and the IPL

29th April, 2011:

WICB chief Ernest Hilaire’s comments about the West Indian team hit a raw nerve—Shivnarine Chanderpaul’s.

When he termed the West Indian cricketers of the past 15 years as lacking application and discipline, he overlooked the chip on Chanderpaul’s shoulder.

The Guyanese bat of Indian origin who uncomplainingly carried Windies hopes, oft receiving less than his share of glory—overshadowed first by Brian Lara and later Chris Gayle—, came out strongly in a letter addressed to Hilaire .

Questioning the use of ‘we’ in his interview, the Guyanese asked him, “Are you speaking for yourself, albeit as CEO of the West Indies Cricket Board or are you speaking for and on behalf of the West Indies Cricket Board itself?”

Chanderpaul threatened to take whatever action necessary to safeguard his reputation.

The boot is truly on the other foot.

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Preity Zinta, Vijay Mallya,Shilpa Shetty and SRK Take on The BCCI (Satire)

In a fresh twist to the IPL saga, Vijay Mallya, Shilpa Shetty, Preity Zinta and Shah Rukh Khan have all decided to stand for BCCI elections.

The four owners of IPL franchises feel that it is in their best interests to serve as board members while at the same time retaining a fiscal interest in the IPL.

“If Srinivasan can hold office and have a team, why can’t we own a team and be office-bearers? It’s only fair.” said Vijay Mallya.

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Ricky Ponting smashes another television set (Satire)

Ricky Ponting smashed another television set—this time at home.

The provocation for this act of ‘vandalism’ was the news that Duncan Fletcher has been appointed coach of the Indian cricket team.

It is learned from reliable, unnamed sources that the former Australian captain was in the running for arguably “the most difficult job in the sub-continent”. Negotiations with the BCCI were on-going—under the radar.

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