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IPL 2015: A big tamasha that could be better
Have you been following IPL 8?
Be truthful.
I haven’t.
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It’s not that cricket doesn’t excite me or that watching Chris Gayle or AB DeVilliers clobber bowlers to all parts of the ground and beyond isn’t a thrilling spectacle.
It’s just that it’s no longer interesting, it’s no longer fun.
It’s a surfeit of instant cricket following closely on the heels of the 2015 World Cup.
Yes, the cheerleaders are pleasing to look at; so are Archana Vijay and Shibani Dandekar.
However, it’s simply the same old package with very little changing.
Ravi Shastri, former Indian cricketer. 4 Test series vs Australia at Adelaide Oval (Photo credit: Wikipedia)
The only positive change is the recruiting of former women cricketers as expert commentators.
I support Mumbai Indians.
But Rohit Sharma’s men simply don’t evoke the same passion that the Indian cricket team does.
What is the IPL then? A great Indian tamasha. Enjoy with bhel and popcorn and you won’t suffer from indigestion.
As for the genius who decided that the studio experts should have cheerleaders lauding their every soundbyte, he should have his head examined.
It’s obvious that advertisers have not deserted the Indian Premier League as yet.
But more of such hare-brained shenanigans and they surely will.
Supreme Court: What they said, really meant and definitely didn’t
Supreme justice for N Srinivasan.
What they said:
“Individuals are birds of passage while institutions are forever.”
The Supreme Court bench of Justices T S Thakur and F M I Kalifulla read N Srinivasan his rights in a ruling that effectively prevents him contesting for the BCCI top post.
The judges ruled out any person having a commercial interest in BCCI events from being a part of the governing body. Srinivasan has a controlling interest in Chennai Super Kings, an IPL team.
They said:
“The BCCI is a very important institution that discharges important public functions. Demands of institutional integrity are, therefore, heavy and need to be met suitably in larger public interest. Individuals are birds of passage while institutions are forever.
The expectations of the millions of cricket lovers in particular and public at large in general have lowered considerably the threshold of tolerance for any mischief, wrong doing or corrupt practices which ought to be weeded out of the system.”
What they really meant:
“…birds of passage…..And your time is past, Mr. Srinivasan. You are not the BCCI and the BCCI is not you.”
What they definitely didn’t:
“Could we have a couple of freebies to the CSK games, Mr. Srinivasan, please?”
MS Dhoni: What he said, really meant and definitely didn’t
Mahendra Singh Dhoni couldn’t be spicier with his final words as Test captain.
What he said:
“Now, even PETA has said that you can’t cosmetically remove the tail.”
Responding to a scribe’s question, “Their (Australia’s) tail is like Hanuman’s. Yours is like a Doberman’s. That must be hurting your side,” India’s outgoing skipper replied:
“Now, even PETA has said that you can’t cosmetically remove the tail. It has been a big problem for us that we don’t have a genuine allrounder. We have tried to play six batsmen and five bowlers before, but then the tail becomes as long as a cow’s … Hopefully, if we can find an allrounder, the tail problem will be resolved. But the tail problem is really a big problem.”
The man who brought back the World Cup to India remarked thus when asked to compare the two whitewashes of 2011 and 2011-12:
“You die, you die; you don’t see which is a better way to die. You end your Test career, you end your Test career. You don’t see which is a better way to end your Test career.”
What he really meant:
“There’s nothing pleasing about the way the Indian tail disintegrates in the face of aggression. Nothing cosmetic about it for sure.”
What he definitely didn’t:
“The Indian tail proudly announces the formation of a new body, PETT—People for the Ethical Treatment of Tail-enders.”
Harbhajan Singh: What he said, really meant and definitely didn’t
Harbhajan Singh ‘Marshalls’ domestic pacers.
Harbhajan Singh – Ind Vs Eng,Mumbai, March 29,2006. Copyright I am the creator of the photograph. Camera manufacturer :: CANON, Camera model :: A610; Pixels :: 5 Megapixels; Zoom :: 4X (Photo credit: Wikipedia)
What he said:
“But we shouldn’t leave so much grass where even a 120-kph bowler appears like Malcolm Marshall.”
Indian team discard and off-spinner Harbhajan Singh is critical of the BCCI policy to provide green-top wickets for the ongoing Ranji trophy.
He said:
“Our wickets make such bowlers look unplayable. Some of these bowlers end up picking 50 wickets in a season. So you can’t ignore them. When such a bowler is picked for international cricket, he gets exposed while bowling on a slightly drier surface. The ball doesn’t reach the batsman.”
“I feel the wicket should offer help to pacers on the first morning but it shouldn’t get bowlers into a mindset that ‘waah, toss jeet gaye, ab toh mera hi din hai [wow, we have won the toss. Now it is my day]’. There should be help for bowlers but if a batsman applies himself he should also be able to score big. And on the fourth-fifth days, spinners should come into play.
Play on a sporting wicket but don’t play on a wicket where ordinary bowlers are made to look terrorizing. It doesn’t help. We are not taking the game anywhere. You are giving fake confidence to bowlers. Anybody can bowl on such wickets. It is like on a rank turner, anybody can take wickets. Similarly, any seamer who can swing the ball a bit and bowls a good line and length will do well on such tops. But to make it challenging, you have to make the conditions change just like it happens in Test cricket.”
What he really meant:
“It was alright when we had spinning wickets on the first day for home Tests, and we spinners could corner all the wickets. The fast bowlers would just take the shine off the ball. But this means the boot is on the other foot and I can’t kick unshod. Besides, how am I to make the World Cup squad if I can’t get anyone out?”
What he definitely didn’t:
“The additional bounce suits me just fine. My kind of bowling relies less on turn and more on upward trajectory.”
N Srinivasan: What he said, really meant and definitely didn’t
N Srinivasan is not resigned to his fate.
What he said:
“Why should I ask him to resign?”
N Srinivasan is not conflicted about whether he should retain Indian skipper MS Dhoni as an India Cements Limited employee and Chennai Super Kings captain.
The beleaguered BCCI chief was rapped by the Supreme Court for a conflict of interest in the hearing on the Mudgal commission report’s investigation into the IPL spot-fixing scandal.
Replying to reporters as to what Dhoni’s role was at ICL, the ICC chairman snapped:
“Why should I tell you?
What he really meant:
“Who am I to ask Dhoni to quit while I don’t? Why should he? Is he my son-in-law?”
What he definitely didn’t:
“Am I my CSK team’s skipper’s keeper?”
Sanjay Patel: What he said, really meant and definitely didn’t
Sanjay Patel
What he said:
“They can go on holiday, or go back home. They can even come to India if they want.”
BCCI secretary Sanjay Patel minces no words about Team India’s bowling coach Joe Dawes’ and fielding coach Trevor Penney’s options on being relieved of their duties post the disastrous result in the Big Test series against England.
What he really meant:
“What they do now on their own time is none of the BCCI’s business. It’ s a purely professional transaction. They’re hired based on past results and recommendations and fired based on results and feedback. Can they have it any other way? Besides, they deserve a holiday—a well-earned one—and I can recommend no better place to vacation than India.”
What he definitely didn’t:
“How about Tourism India roping in Dawes and Penney as brand ambassadors?”
MS Dhoni: What he said, really meant and definitely didn’t
Mahendra Singh Dhoni
What he said:
“Don’t be so jealous of IPL.”
The Indian skipper was quick to respond to a query from scribes whether Indian players would forsake the IPL and work on their Test game instead by playing county cricket in England.
What he really meant:
“County cricket doesn’t pay that much any more, does it? Besides, it’s an Indian league and why should the Indian players be elsewhere? Will our team owners and the BCCI be agreeable? Also, it’s the cricketers main source of income when they’re not playing for the national squad. Why ruin our fun, our time in the sun?”
What he definitely didn’t:
“The IPL’s like my wife Sakshi to me. You malign her(it) and you’ll have me to deal with.”
N Srinivasan: What he said, really meant and definitely didn’t
Related articles
Sharmila Writes to BCCI to Name Series After Pataudi(news.outlookindia.com)
BCCI trying to gift IPL team to Srinivasan’s pals: Modi(sportskeeda.com)
IPL team gifted to Srinivasan’s friends: Lalit Modi(cricketnext.in.com)
India v England: Super king Narayanaswami Srinivasan insists the IPL is a force for good(telegraph.co.uk)
N Srinivasan: What he said, really meant and definitely didn’t
Related articles
Value of IPL always delivers: Srinivasan(timesofindia.indiatimes.com)
- Sharmila Writes to BCCI to Name Series After Pataudi(news.outlookindia.com)
- BCCI trying to gift IPL team to Srinivasan’s pals: Modi(sportskeeda.com)
MS Dhoni – Oh Captain, my Captain!(sportskeeda.com)
- India v England: Super king Narayanaswami Srinivasan insists the IPL is a force for good(telegraph.co.uk)
Ravi Shastri and Sunil Gavaskar serving two masters?
“No man can serve two masters.Either he will hate the one and love the other, or he will be devoted to the one and despise the other.”
That’s what the Good Book states.
An article in Outlook India highlighted the inherent conflict of interest in the job profiles of Sunil Gavaskar and Ravi Shastri when they (supposedly) provide unbiased, expert comments on games involving India while at the same time they are contracted directly to the Board for Cricket Control in India (BCCI).
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