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Shane Watson clinches it for Aussies
Overheard on Monday afternoon, the 11th of April, 2011:
“What’s on?”
“Watson!”
“That’s what I said! What’s on?”
“Watson! Shane Watson! A Watson blitzkrieg against Bangladesh. That’s what’s on. ”
Shane Watson cracked a brutal 185 against Bangladesh at Mirpur with 15 sixes, a world record.
Roger Federer calls up Kim Clijsters to express his sympathy (Satire)
World No.3 Roger Federer called up Belgian Kim Clijsters to express his sympathy for her freak disco-dancing injury at her cousin Tim’s wedding.
Kim thanked him and asked for his advice as to how best to recover and avoid similar injuries in the future.
The great Swiss reportedly broke into song on the telephone, yodelling to the tune of Genesis’ ‘I can’t dance’:
Poonam Pandey, Cheer Queens and Supermodels (Humour)
That Poonam Pandey enjoys flirting with danger was well evident in her offer to do the Full Monty if Team India won the World Cup.
Despite receiving threatening calls and recovering from kidney stone removal surgery, the model intends to keep her word.
As if to make up for her hardships, Akshaye Kumar has offered her a chance to appear on his dare-devil television show for ladies “Khatron Ke Khiladi”.
Virender Sehwag bats out a maiden over, to bookies’ distress (Satire)
Indian bookies are disappointed with Virender Sehwag.
The dashing Indian opener played out a maiden over against Lasith Malinga in a group encounter for Delhi Daredevils against Mumbai Indians.
The bookmakers are believed to have suffered heavy losses. The odds against such a happening were astronomical.
Indian babies born on April 2, 2011 to be awarded cash prize by BCCI (Satire)
The BCCI has decided to extend its munificence—following Team India’s World Cup triumph—to every baby born on the 2nd of April, 2011.
India has a baby born every two seconds. That makes approximately 30 * 60 * 24 = 43,200 babies born on the auspicious day.
IPL franchisees demand a say in appointment of curators (Satire)
There are more rumbles within the IPL.
The franchisees are not all pleased with the auctions. Though teams have largely grabbed the players they short-listed, the team owners feel that they should have a say in the appointment of curators and groundsmen especially at their home venues.
Insuring World Cup events and IPL players , at a price (Humour)
Almost all top guns in the IPL have been insured by their respective teams, ranging from Sachin Tendulkar (Rs. 44.97 crores) to Gautam Gambhir (Rs. 11.64 crores).
Wouldn’t it have been a great idea for the ICC to secure insurance cover against original trophies locked down by bureaucratic Customs officials? The eventualities covered could include embarrassment caused by disclosures that ‘hugged-and-kissed’ trophy is a replica, free World Cup tickets demanded by said officials and sundry miscellaneous damages including loss-of-face.
Shane Warne is new host of ‘The Week That Wasn’t’ (Satire)
CNN-IBN have announced that for the duration of IPL4, beginning Saturday, 9th April, 2011, their show ‘The Week That Wasn’t’ will not be hosted by Cyrus Broacha.
He will be replaced by ‘Sheik Of Tweak’ Shane Warne.
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Make Time For Sports. 