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Sachin Tendulkar referrals to be voted in by television audience (Satire)
MUMBAI—
The glaring error made by television broadcasters while replaying different camera views of a referred Sachin Tendulkar dismissal in the IPL has prompted tournament CEO, Sundar Raman, to propose a unique, innovative solution.
Every time an appeal against the master batsman is referred to the third umpire, the replayed feed will be telecast to television viewers prior to the third umpire.
Viewers will be provided a number to text where they will vote on whether the batsman is out or not.
What he said, really meant and definitely didn’t: S Badrinath
What he said:
“He told me that you are at the big stage, people are going to write good things and bad things about you. But at the end of the day, you want that. The trees with the most fruits get stones thrown at them. I thought that was great advice.”
S Badrinath recollecting Sachin Tendulkar’s advice to him prior to his Test debut.
What he really meant:
“You don’t get criticised if you do nothing.”
What he definitely didn’t:
“Do nothing.”
What he said,really meant and definitely didn’t: Jacques Kallis
What he said:
“It felt a little odd playing in the stadium without the crowd behind me but, then again, my home stadium is now Eden Gardens so it’s not as if I have moved down market.”
Jacques Kallis on the strangeness of playing an away game for KKR at Chinaswamy Stadium, Bangalore, his former team’s home ground.
What he really meant:
“It’s not so bad, I’ve traded up. Eden Gardens for Bangalore.”
What he definitely didn’t:
“Whom am I kidding? It’s me that’s been traded.”
What he said, meant and definitely didn’t: Jacques Kallis
What he said:
“Using the D/L method to decide the result of a game is like playing golf with a yellow ball. It’s not the real thing and it feels cheap, but you do it if you have to. It’s better than not playing golf at all — but only just!”
Jacques Kallis expressing his views on the Ducksworth-Lewis method used for T20 cricket.
What he really meant:
“Playing golf with a yellow ball is OK but only if all you want to do is play the game, somehow.”
What he definitely didn’t:
“Cricket should be played with a golf ball.”
Shane Warne: Smoke Gets In Our Eyes
HUMOR — It was all going swimmingly well for Shane Warne until it all went terribly wrong.
The Royals began IPL 2011 reminding supporters of 2008 glory. Then, “Dame” Elizabeth Hurley flew in from London to join the champion bowler. RR lost not a game at home.
But then, alas, Liz left for London sweeping away with her Warney’s luck.
Saurav Ganguly, the unseen force in West Bengal politics (Satire)
Buddhadeb Bhattacharjee has squarely blamed Shah Rukh Khan and his Kolkatta Knight Riders for the CPI(M)–led Left Front’s abysmal showing in the West Bengal assembly elections.
“The absence of Saurav Ganguly from KKR ranks upset the general populace. There was no anti-incumbency , no tiredness with 34 years of ‘misrule’, not even Nandigram,” said the veteran political leader.
What he said, really meant and definitely didn’t: Jacques Kallis
What he said:
“I am an easy man to please and one of the greatest pleasures is taking money off Mark Boucher on the golf course.”
Jacques Kallis finds SA and Kolkatta Knightriders team-mate easy meat on the links.
What he really meant:
“Pocket money’s always welcome.”
What he definitely didn’t:
“I’d continue playing Mark is if I kept losing.”
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