KKR

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Gautam Gambhir: What he said, really meant and definitely didn’t


Gautam Gambhir does not have flying pigs on his mind.

What he said:

“I think Sunil Narine will offer just another 12-second smile even if one day he sees pigs fly.”

Gautam Gambhir is certain that his team-mate Sunil Narine will meet both success and failure expressionlessly.

The Kolkata Knight Riders skipper is amazed that the West Indian bowler is none-too-perturbed at being reported for a dubious bowling action to the Champions League T20 Committee.

Gambhir writes:

“We were in the dressing room. I was waiting to see if his face reveals an expression. It didn’t. In the bus as we headed back to our hotel, I was still waiting. Nothing happened. At the hotel a cake shaped in numerical “13” to mark our winning streak was waiting for us.

 A cake riot followed but my man offered just a 12 second smile. Later in the night we were all huddled in our team-room on the 16th floor. The boys were having fun downing beers and chicken wings rejoicing our achievement. My expression-less friend and I were in one corner playing football on Playstation. He played a flowing game and won. I thought he’d exult but nothing happened except a smile.”
He added:

“Good or bad, success or failure, win or loss Sunil has never showed emotions. Therefore, when he was warned for a suspect bowling action after our win over Dolphins on Monday night, I was worried. I didn’t know how he would react. I kept observing him searching for a hint of disappointment, worry or the likes on his face, but his expression was consistent.

Indifferent.

I knew deep down he was hurt and his pride dented. No sportsperson likes to be nudged for unfair practice. Sunil is no different. He must have been simmering deep down but he didn’t show it to anyone. We had a one-sided conversation for about 40 seconds. I told him, ‘Sunny (Sunil’s nickname), I have full faith in you.’ He offered a straight face. I continued: ‘I know you are not resorting to any unfair practice.’He nodded. ‘Just don’t worry, the entire KKR team is with you.'”

What Gambhir really meant:

“Narine’s my match-winner and I have to make sure that he is in the right frame of mind for the upcoming crucial games. Tonight, I’ll have hogs fly past his window just to make sure.”

What he definitely didn’t:

  “I’m sure that Narine has nothing to say about being reported. It’s just one of those things that have happened in the past month. Perhaps, he feels he’s in exalted company. Or it’s just another hazard of the  off-spinning trade. Maybe, he’s a stoic. Possibly he’s been advised by his agent and/or lawyer to admit to nothing. I wonder if he’ll stop bowling in long sleeves now.”

 

IPL: Into the play-offs, into the night


The suspense has ended.IPL play-offs have been decided.

Super  Sunday will repeat itself in two instalments on the 24th and 25th of May, 2011 at the Wankhede.

It’ll be the Royal Challengers Bangalore versus Chennai Super Kings in the first qualifier.

Mumbai Indians and Kolkatta Knight Riders will clash once more on Wednesday in the eliminator.

The Eliminator? Sounds like a wrestling tie to me.

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Mumbai Indians face possible relegation from IPL play-offs


Sachin Tendulkar fielding at Adelaide Oval

Mumbai Indians crashed to their third defeat in a row. Shane Warne had the last laugh in the clash of titans.

Surprising how the side that looked so consistent and formidable at the start of the tournament is suddenly found wanting on slower pitches. The first three seasons witnessed the team heavily dependent on the genius of Sachin Tendulkar and to a lesser extent, Sanath Jayasuriya’s.Kieron Pollard’s bludgeoning club added heft.

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What he said,really meant and definitely didn’t: Jacques Kallis


What he said:

“It felt a little odd playing in the stadium without the crowd behind me but, then again, my home stadium is now Eden Gardens so it’s not as if I have moved down market.”

Jacques Kallis on the strangeness of playing an away game for KKR at Chinaswamy Stadium, Bangalore, his former team’s home ground.

What he really meant:

“It’s not so bad, I’ve traded up. Eden Gardens for Bangalore.”

What he definitely didn’t:

“Whom am I kidding? It’s me that’s been traded.”

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Saurav Ganguly, the unseen force in West Bengal politics (Satire)


Buddhadev_Bhattacharjee

Buddhadeb Bhattacharjee has squarely blamed Shah Rukh Khan and his Kolkatta Knight Riders for the CPI(M)–led Left Front’s abysmal showing in the West Bengal assembly elections.

“The absence of Saurav Ganguly from KKR ranks upset the general populace. There was no anti-incumbency , no tiredness with 34 years of ‘misrule’, not even Nandigram,” said the veteran political leader.

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What he said, meant and what he definitely didn’t: Shah Rukh Khan


What he said:

“Dada is my favourite player. But we need to move on. I wish him all the best with Pune Warriors and hope that he does really well.”

Shah Rukh Khan making it clear that KKR don’t need Saurav Ganguly’s services.

What he meant:

“Now if Ganguly would have done a few more promotions with me, everything would have been hunky-dory.”

What he definitely didn’t:

“In Chak De II, I’m playing the coach again and Dada’s the captain of the team.”

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Salman Khan ‘Dabangg’ refused offer from Pune Warriors: Saurav Ganguly benefits (Satire)


Dabangg

MUMBAI—

Salman Khan was offered a spot with Pune Warriors as a replacement for Ashish Nehra.

The ‘Dabangg star was asked by Sahara Group’s director of communications, Mr. Abhijit Sarkar, to play for the struggling IPL side.

The overture was made prior to the subsequent signing of Saurav Ganguly.

“Salman was quite enthused about the idea of turning out for an IPL side and was set to don grey flannels. We gave him an additional sweetener by allowing Zarine Khan to be one of the Cheer Queens.”

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SRK, KKR and Kajol, Rani and Bipasha at the IPL (Humour)


Shahrukh Khan at the Zee Carnival in Sun Tech ...

Shah Rukh Khan is at the end of his tether.

Sourav Ganguly at the opening of the mascot of...

Nothing, absolutely nothing, will convince Dada fans that SRK  loves Sourav Ganguly (and Bengalis) and that’s why he let him go.

Slashing the price of tickets for forthcoming KKR games has not quite had the desired effect as evidenced by fan reaction on the team web-site.

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Poonam Pandey, Cheer Queens and Supermodels (Humour)


That Poonam Pandey enjoys flirting with danger was well evident in her offer to do the Full Monty if Team India won the World Cup.

Despite receiving threatening calls and recovering from kidney stone removal surgery, the model intends to keep her word.

As if to make up for her hardships, Akshaye Kumar has offered her a chance to appear on his dare-devil television show for ladies “Khatron Ke Khiladi”.

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IPL has more than enough gas to cover the fourth stage


Shilpa Shetty

The game between Chennai Super Kings and Kolkatta Knight Riders was a humdinger. A last-ball finish was a perfect ending to a cliff-hanger.

Fresh personnel could not take KKR over the line. Captain Cool MS Dhoni retains the Midas touch though he seemed a little lacklustre in the field.

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