Mahendra Singh Dhoni: Protector of the “endangered” (Satire)

RANCHI—

In breaking news, it is learnt that India’s cricket captain, Mahendra Singh Dhoni, was approached—jointly—by the West Indian Players Association (WIPA) and the West Indian Cricket Board (WICB) to become the brand ambassador of Caribbean cricket.

The  bodies-at-loggerheads—through Dhoni—seek to drive home the message that West Indian cricket is under threat of slow extinction and needs revival to  promote continuation of a joyous, carefree brand of island cricket.

The WIPA and WICB intend to publish full-page advertisements in island newspapers highlighting the association. The ads will carry Dhoni’s pictures and his message to cricket followers in the Caribbean.

“Come forward to protect the natural beauty of West Indian cricket.” the ads proclaim.

In related news, Australia’s  Simon Katich, Ricky Ponting and Michael Hussey and West Indies’ Shivnaraine Chanderpaul have requested the Jharkhand resident to represent  “Over 35 cricketers everywhere”—another “endangered” species.

It is learnt that the two groups are encouraged by Dhoni’s cultivation of imperilled species in his home state—the tiger and Jharkhand’s flora and fauna.

“Save Over 35 cricketers” and “Save West Indian cricket” could become worldwide campaigns—should the Indian skipper accept.

(All facts and “quotes” in this article are fabricated but you knew that already, didn’t you?)

Quote of the day:
It has always been the prerogative of children and half-wits to point out that the emperor has no clothes. But the half-wit remains a half-wit, and the emperor remains an emperor. – Neil Gaiman