Make Time For Sports.
humor
Ricky Ponting’s the next Scott Draper (Humour)
Ricky Ponting has decided to take up professional golf.
Seriously.
It’s that damned fool Gary Player who’s been filling his head with these ideas.
Player did not even know who Ricky was when he first met him. But can he recognise a fine swing or what?
What next?
From the English to the Lankans, ‘Come as you are’ (Humour)
David Lloyd, in the Independent, remarked thus: “England’s first series since the Ashes euphoria of four months ago may feel more like a ‘come as you are’ street party than a suited-and-booted city pageant.”
The comment was directed at the up-coming tour of England by Sri Lanka.
Bumble was, of course, referring to the current state of unrest in Sri Lankan cricket; a change of captain and vice-captain, the resignation of the selection committee, the retirement of Lasith Malinga from Test cricket and the lure of the IPL putting paid to plans of a training camp before the team embarked on the series.
The English team would be well-advised to welcome the tourists with this Nirvana song, penned by Kurt Cobain.
What he said, meant and definitely didn’t: Gary Player
What he said:
“The way you hit the ball, you’re wasting your time playing cricket.”
South African golfing great, Gary Player, to Ricky Ponting on watching him golf.
What he meant:
“You can drive even better on the golf course.”
What he definitely didn’t:
“Cricket’s for cows.”
“You’re the next Tiger Woods.”
What he said, meant and definitely didn’t : David Lloyd
What he said:
“England’s first series since the Ashes euphoria of four months ago may feel more like a ‘come as you are’ street party than a suited-and-booted city pageant.”
David Lloyd aka Bumble on the up-coming tour of England by Sri Lanka.
What he meant:
“The Lankans will hardly have any time to slip out of their IPL pyjamas for the Tests.”
What he definitely didn’t:
“Why not play the Tests in pyjamas? And at night? Lalit Modi’s here, let’s ask him to help out.”
E-book readers kill book cricket (Satire)
MUMBAI.
Exponents of ‘book cricket’ are concerned about the future of the game.
The advent of e-books and e-readers threatens to make the game obsolete in schools and colleges all over the country.
“Once e-books and e-readers become prevalent, ‘book cricket’ as a sport will die out.” says Mr. Raddiwallah, an avid book-cricketer.
Muralidharan substantiates Hashan Tillekaratne’s allegations of match-fixing (Satire)
Muttiah Muralidharan admitted that there exists more than a modicum of ‘truth’ in Hashan Tillekaratne’s allegations of match-fixing in Sri Lanka.
The legendary off-spinner stated that he ,too ,indulged in match-fixing.
“My wife and I were fixed up. It was an arranged match and I don’t see anything wrong with it. It is a Indo-Sri Lanka collaboration that has worked to our mutual benefit.” said the Tamil , with a toothy grin.
Preity Zinta, Vijay Mallya,Shilpa Shetty and SRK Take on The BCCI (Satire)
In a fresh twist to the IPL saga, Vijay Mallya, Shilpa Shetty, Preity Zinta and Shah Rukh Khan have all decided to stand for BCCI elections.
The four owners of IPL franchises feel that it is in their best interests to serve as board members while at the same time retaining a fiscal interest in the IPL.
“If Srinivasan can hold office and have a team, why can’t we own a team and be office-bearers? It’s only fair.” said Vijay Mallya.
What he said, meant and definitely didn’t : Sunil Gavaskar
What he said:
“Someone like Amarnath would have been a better choice for the simple reason that the core of the Indian team today is from the Hindi-speaking belt.”
Sunny Gavaskar comments on the choice of Duncan Fletcher as coach of Team India.
What he meant:
“We all speak Hindi, don’t we? And Mohinder definitely does. Besides, Amarnath’s not a joker.”
What he definitely didn’t:
“We need Hindi speaking coaches to teach our boys the choicest abuses while sledging the opposition that are not easily expressed in any other language.Actually, that’s Punjabi but I could never tell the difference.And neither can they.”
Ricky Ponting smashes another television set (Satire)
Ricky Ponting smashed another television set—this time at home.
The provocation for this act of ‘vandalism’ was the news that Duncan Fletcher has been appointed coach of the Indian cricket team.
It is learned from reliable, unnamed sources that the former Australian captain was in the running for arguably “the most difficult job in the sub-continent”. Negotiations with the BCCI were on-going—under the radar.
Number of readers subscribed
Read it on Apple News
Read it on Apple News
Stat Counter
Sports, Health and Exercise
- An error has occurred; the feed is probably down. Try again later.
Make Time For Sports. 