1) In a mass séance, souls of Indian batsmen transposed into their English counterparts’ bodies. It’s no wonder, we have Kevin Pietersen batting like Sachin Tendulkar and Alastair Cook doing a Gautam Gambhir and Virender Sehwag—the best of both.
2) The cricketers’ families are being held hostage at gun-point by ex-SAS mercenaries. They will be released when the desired result is achieved—a 4-0 thrashing.
3) The Anti-Bookies Secret Society of India (ABSSI) launched a covert operation—in concert with the ICC—to drive illegal Indian bookies out of business. What were the odds on a 4-0 victory margin for the English? What were the odds on Sachin Tendulkar not completing his 100th international century? The matka kings are upset.
4) Duncan Fletcher is really a Pom spy leaking out vital weaknesses of key Indian players.
5) The BCCI believes that Test cricket is not a money-spinner like ODIs, T20 and the IPL. This is one way of fuelling disinterest in the longer format of the game. Why waste BCCI time and resources on scheduling Test tours? Very little bang for their buck.
|Mathematicians are like Frenchmen: whatever you say to them, they translate it into their own language, and forthwith it means something entirely different.
Johann Wolfgang von Goethe
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- Duncan Fletcher: What he said, really meant and definitely did not (maketimeforsports.com)