fun

Tommy Haas: What he said, really meant and definitely did not

What he said:

"You know, if you count up all the months I’ve missed due to injuries or surgeries that I’ve had, I’m probably 29 years old really."

Tommy Haas is not that old—according to him. The German was responding to the question that he’s perhaps better because of the time he spent off court in his prime.

What he really meant:

“I really think I can do a minor Agassi star turn here.”

What he definitely didn’t:

“I can get the mirror to lie to me—daily. Some days, better than others.”

Roger Federer: What he said, really meant and definitely did not

What he said:

“No, I haven’t.  I might read it.  I don’t know.  I haven’t come across it yet.  He hasn’t given me one yet.  (Laughter.) If he doesn’t, I’ll go buy one.  That’s not the issue.  (Laughter.) No, I haven’t had the time yet.  I don’t know if it’s gonna happen soon.”

Roger Federer has not yet read Rafael Nadal’s biography “Rafa: My Story” co-written with John Carlin.

What he really meant:

“I would have if he had said nasty things about me. Then these questions would have been unavoidable.”

What he definitely didn’t:

“Why are you asking me a silly question like this? It’s Rafa’s book, not mine.”

Carlos Berlocq: What he said, really meant and definitely did not

What he said:

"This guy is from another planet."

Carlos Berlocq was served a double bagel by No. 1 seed, Novak Djokovic in his second round match at the US Open. The Argentinean recovered somewhat to take two games off the Serb’s serve but was unable to hold serve himself. The final score: 6-0,6-0, 6-2.

Djokovic learned that he cannot please everyone despite running away victor in 90 minutes.

"One of the guys actually on the way out said: ‘Hey, listen, I paid 100 bucks. You’re staying an hour and a half on the court. That’s a lot to pay for a ticket. Give me something so I get back home with a happy face. Give me a racquet or something."

What he really meant:

“Gravity has no effect on Novak—this year.”

What he definitely didn’t:

“If Novak only had pointy ears, I’d have no trouble terming him Spock (of Star Trek).”

Christina Mchale: What she said, really meant and definitely did not

What she said:

“And, yeah, it feels like you’re on an airplane.”

Christina Mchale compares her experience in a CVAC Pod to being on an aircraft. The pressurised egg has evoked intense curiosity in the press corps after Novak Djokovic attributed (and then denied) his success this year ,partly to  his utilization of the technology that simulates altitude training.

The rest of the conversation:

Q.  The pressurized air?
CHRISTINA McHALE: Uh huh.
Q.  You did it the same place that Novak did it, the same house?
CHRISTINA McHALE:  Yeah.
Q.  How long were you in it?
CHRISTINA McHALE:  I mean, it’s like little sessions.  I don’t even remember, like seven minute sessions.
Q.  When I get off an airplane I feel terrible.
CHRISTINA McHALE:  I didn’t do it enough to be able to give you like an expert opinion on it.  I don’t know.

What she really meant:

“I’ll just fly more often if that works. I have to, anyway.”

What she definitely didn’t:

“Now, I wonder if I can get CVAC to serve meals while I’m in there.”

Andy Roddick: What he said, really meant and definitely did not

What he said:

“I’m convinced being a tennis analyst is the easiest job in the world. Because whatever the person does, if it works, you just say, ‘That’s what’s good,’ and if it doesn’t work, you guys just go, ‘He should have done the other thing.’ I’m pretty convinced that I could be a tennis analyst when I’m done."

Andy Roddick, take a bow. The 2003 US Open champion launched into a tirade against tennis analysts, terming them arm-chair experts.

Roddick claimed:

“It just doesn’t take much thought. If I’m grinding, and I’m winning, you guys are like, ‘He’s reinvented himself,’ and if I’m playing like crap and pushing, it’s, you know, ‘He’s horrible and needs to hit the ball.’ Everybody’s an expert, but I’m better than most of them have been."

Nobody’s arguing with the former champion. Very few analysts have won Slams or as many tournaments as Roddick has.

Hats off for telling it like it is.

What he really meant:

“Sports analysis is easy. You’re right if the player’s wrong. You’re still right if the player’s not.”

What he definitely didn’t:

“I’m done reading my copy of ‘How To Take Criticism With a Smile’. I’d love to lend it to you guys—now (that I’ve had my say).”

Andy Murray: What he said, really meant and definitely did not

What he said:

"Try being a British player going into a Grand Slam. It’s not easy."

Andy Murray shrugs aside the ‘nerves’ question in the press conference following his gritty win over India’s Somdev Devvarman in the first round at the US Open.

Murray clarified his statement:

“It was a little bit of a joke, a little bit of truth in it. I think for anyone that sort of wants to go on and win a slam or, you know, feels like they’re in with a shot, you know, I think it’s natural to start.  You know, you put a lot of effort and preparation into getting ready for these events and, you know, you don’t want to get off to a bad start or whatever. I think nerves are a good thing.  I think it shows you care and that, like I say, I put a lot into getting ready for it.  I hope my game’s going to be there and the hard work pays off.”

What he really meant:

“The weight of expectations from the press (you guys) is heavy on my shoulders. I’m stooped before my time.”

What he definitely didn’t:

“Let’s grab Tim Henman and get him to elaborate further.”

Novak Djokovic:What he said, really meant and definitely did not

What he said:

"I’m aware of the responsibility that I have as a present number one to represent the sport in some ways off the court. So I need to do that in a best possible way. You know, I’m trying. You tell me, how am I doing?"

Novak Djokovic cares about being No.1.

What he really meant:

“It’s quite difficult, you know. Earlier, I could take the mickey out of Roger (Federer) or Rafael (Nadal) when they were ranked higher. But I can’t mimic myself, can I?”

What he definitely didn’t:

“That explains the Maria Sharapova Head commercials.”

Novak Djokovic: What he said, really meant and definitely did not

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What he said:

“Well, it would be great if that machine had wings so it can fly wherever I am playing.”

Novak Djokovic denies that the CVAC Pod or “pressurised egg” is the reason behind his stupendous run of form this year. The technology, Cyclic Variations In Adaptive Conditioning (CVAC) simulates “rapid changes in altitude, which allegedly stimulates the body on a cellular level, therefore increasing oxygen absorption and promoting muscle recovery—in essence boosting the lymphatic system.”

In his initial talk with the Wall Street Journal (WSJ), the men’s No. 1 player praised the device:

"I think it really helps — not with muscle but more with recovery after an exhausting set.It’s like a spaceship. It’s very interesting technology."

Djokovic has since refuted using the technology to enhance his results this year.

The Djoker said:

"I’m going to repeat it for the last time: It doesn’t have any influence on my success."

What he really meant:

“Get real. I can’t take that machine with me everywhere, can I?”

What he definitely didn’t:

“The Flying Serb and his Flying Machine—wouldn’t that make a great headline?”

Li Na: What she said, really meant and definitely did not

What she said:

"Because after they beat you, they think, ‘Oh, I beat a Grand Slam champion.’"

Chinese tennis star, Li Na, reacts after her opener loss to Romanian teenager, Simona Halep. The French Open champion has struggled in the latter part of the season. Na lost 2-6, 5-7 in straight sets, her second successive exit in the first round at the tournament.

Na said:

"Before the match, I talked to my coach. I said I didn’t have good timing to hit the ball. He told me everything is perfect, everything is fantastic.”

"I say, ‘Yes, everything is fantastic, but I always lose first round.’

"This is not fantastic. I think we need to change something. I think maybe the coach just tried to give me confidence, but I don’t think I got it."

What she really meant:

“I’m a treasured scalp—a trophy in itself.”

What she definitely didn’t:

“If they lose to you, they think, ‘Oh, it’s OK, I lost to a Grand Slam champion.’”

Shashank Manohar: What he said, really meant and definitely did not

What he said:

“It is not as if the BCCI is a closed-door body.”

BCCI President, Shashank Manohar, defends the cricket board’s right to stay independent. The Indian sports ministry is seeking to classify the richest sports body in the world as a national federation under the proposed National Sports (Development) Bill 2011. It is believed that the move would make the BCCI accountable under the Right To Information (RTI) act—a view contested by the BCCI.

Manohar reacted claiming that the BCCI “being a non-governmental organization, which has its own constitution and generates its own funds” does not fall under any of the applicable categories.

“In fact, there are two orders passed by the country’s Chief Information Commissioner wherein it has been clearly stated that the RTI Act doesn’t apply to the BCCI."

The Board President contended:

“All said and done, cricket is the best administered sport in the country.”

What he really meant:

“How can we have a closed door policy? There is no door. Lalit Modi’s generous tweets and disclosures (from UK) battered it down.”

What he definitely didn’t:

“The BCCI is sanctioning the building of a fresh office—all glass.”